Friday, December 2, 2011

Revelations

..and no I'm not talking about the Bible here...

So I had quiet a revalation recently.

I have been dating a guy for a couple of months and things were going great.. then it went from great to really?  So for the past week or so I've been trying to get to the bottom of what was going on inside of his head, and I think I've got a good grasp. See he gave me some BS reasons and I called him out on it. He finally admits that it's because of my constant non-seriousness and sarcastic remarks. Really? So the only issue in our relationship is that. I think that's pretty darn good.  Especially coming from a relationship where we had so many things wrong between us that the only thing we agreed on was that we weren't right for each other.  I mean really? I find it quiet laughable... but this morning as I was thinking about things.. because I'm a huge over-thinker... I came to the revelation that it wasn't that I'm non-serious/sarcastic, it's the fact that I'm a pretty strong and independent woman who can take care of herself and doesn't 'need' a man.  What's interesting is that most men say that's what they want, but in reality, they don't know how to handle a woman who can take care of herself.  As I think back when I recently put plastic over my windows (to keep the cold out and the heat it) I did it by myself and I remember him being a little sad that I did it.  Well, it was something that I could do myself, so why would I need someone to help me?  I'm not trying to be a bra-burning femenist here. I'm just saying, I would rather spend quality time with you doing something fun than hanging plastic on my windows.

What I've realized the last couple years about myself is that I'm really good at taking care of myself.  I can do simple things around the house, I can do a few things with my car, I manage my money, and even find time to cook for myself! I realize that I can be intimidating because I don't 'need' a guy.  What they don't understand is, I don't need you to change the light bulb, but I need you when I'm having a bad day to make me laugh. I need the emotional support.  Just because I don't need you to do things for me doesn't mean I don't need you to be there.  I'm not going to change, nor will I apologize for being this way.  I like the fact that I can take care of myself. When the tough get going, I can go right along with it, because I know I can handle it. I woudl think a guy would like to know that when things get bad, he won't face it alone and that I'd be strong enough to carry him through.

I'm sure I'm not alone in this. And for those who know what I am talking about, you just want to look at these guys and be like, really? Get over yourself.  We are the type of women you want. We are the type of women that will let you live the life you want. Why? Because we are secure in ourselves. We can function on our own. We don't need to have you around 24/7.

So anyways.. that's my rant for today.  Anyone else have these issues? No what I'm talking about?

Take it easy.

P.S. I finally framed my Bing Crosby 'White Christmas' record... I'm posting that soon! I'm in love with it!





2 comments:

Lindsey said...

Sounds like you're realizing the type of man you need;) He'll love you for all those things you are talking about, he's out there but if someone has issues with who you are...then they are definitely not worth your time. By the way...you can't find your Mr. Right if you're with Mr. Wrong:) and don't settle...you're too awesome for that:)

urbanfruitbat said...

I LOVE this! It is sososo true. Men love to feel like we need them, but the fact is, a truly healthy relationship is one that base based on choice. Choosing to be together because you love one another is much better than being together because you need him to do things and vice versa. You got it.